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The 33rd BTACC Tribute

Brought over from my old home…this post will be up until 1st April. Or maybe forever, if i’m tardy/sentimental.

that fateful nightme.fats.mel.gab.forest.porno.johnny.yuru.guo-liang.

So here it is. Für alle…One by one, of course.

melvyn – my suck cock buddy. Likes to telephone the guy sleeping in the bed next to him at 1 in the morning just to listen to Dragostea Din Tei. You maggot, you. Always going home, leaving me by my lonesome in that dark cold bunk. And always being so retarded, i think my intelligence drops whenever you’re around. But he’s got some redeeming qualities…he knows his shit, for one thing…and…err…yeah. May offend people very easily caz of his tone, but rest assured that more often than not, he doesn’t mean it. Someone who you can trust, and definitely not stupid (he’s singapore’s fucking smartest boy, for heck’s sake) so…catch you in the United States, buddy! Nice fighting off arrows with you…hahaha…hope boss doesn’t read this…

fats – Someone who AWOL-ed from camp since he went to WALLABY. Is cute and humourous (don’t you just want to pinch him? Or maybe punch his tum-tum? *bleargh*) Smart enough to pluck out his wisdom teeth one by one, so he gets 20 days of MC. A Meteo Commander who knows his salt, however, so don’t mess with this guy. Hobbies include sleeping in johnny and yu ru’s bunk, partying, waving at smiling Caucasians from the tour bus, and maybe doing last year’s National Day dance. It was fun with you in NZ man…but please don’t go mad again. Also has a thing for the song Everlasting Love. HAHAHAHA…

pornoman (sven) – Addicted to pornography. Boasts of a collection of 80 (eighty) gigabytes of porno at home. Why on Earth are you permanently online, maggot? Apart from feeding your addiction to maple story and pornography…i seriously don’t know why you’re still online. Goes AWOL from time to time, which sends his immediate boss, ryan up the wall and down and up again. Is an expert in camouflage; ask nicely and he’ll teach you the best way to slip into the shadows and avoid arrows. But sven is a FG GOD…i mean like, he knows everything about FG…so maybe he isn’t that bad after all. He’s also athletic, to boot! Ladies, do try to grab him…or at least distract him…He may, however, moan out in Japanese if you excite him too much…that is the result of watching too much anime, suspected to be hentai. If you want tons of free anime, you should really get to know him better. Always up-to-date! And if you’re really nice, he may slip you a DVD of porn as well (ahem!) so…

forest – My fellow fagger. (So, are we quitting?) One of the two unlucky punks who had to fight FATEP. Also one of the guys who went to BATTLEKING with me. Please don’t wake up at, like, 9 a.m. outfield next time. HAHAHA…a good brother who always comes to my bunk to read my magazines, sleep in melvyn’s bed, and get free footrot cream. Recently suffering under another epidermal problem. Likes clubbing and living the wild life.( Insert: for some mysterious reason, he’s always sleepy/-ing whenever someone bangs on his bunk door or calls him. Watch out for the characteristic sound of him stirring from slumber! Also, because of his ability to fall asleep, melvyn and yours truly came up with several politically correct terms for sleeping, which include, u.a., 1. quantum physics – close your eyes and 2 hours pass miraculously! 2. studying circular motion [of the ceiling fan, that is,] 3. studying the insides of your eyelids etc.)

johnny – From NJ with me, john is a pro bowler – watch how his bowling balls perform a wicked hook into the pins, and you’ll become a believer…also highly artistic, but he’s not cocky at all despite having so many talents! 24 SA’s only Sword of Merit…a radar commander like us, but his system only needs like 5 minutes to Action Front and Ceasefire…how unfair life is! A guy with infinite patience, but don’t think you can bully him – he will kick yo ass! I wonder where he is now, though. johnny…johnnycakes…can you hear meeee?

yu ru – someone whose personality is perhaps most like mine. Hochexplosiv and dangerous, tall, dark and enigmatic. Can be damn paikia at times (he shall use his skilful mastery of the Hokkien dialect to make you cease and desist…and with his size, one believes he is fully capable of carrying out his threats) M.I.A. ever since post-WALLABY. Sigh. Eh…can i steal your creatine powder? i wanna size up too you know…(i mean, of course i can steal your powder, i’m just asking you nicely to give me some now.)

guo-liang – Probably the smartest in the batch (yes, singapore’s smartest boy, you’re not really that smart…) and gone over to PGM, which is like, the Dark Side. He was one of the champions (and i mean hero-like champion) who turned down A*Star and their sneering maggoty boss just caz they didn’t want to send him to MIT. (That’s where he’s headed, anyway.) Been out of touch, but thanks for your packs of mint chewing gum. It really does help with cutting down on the fags. Oh, and did i mention this? He’s a fellow oatmeal fan like me! (and no, kah yee, i am still NOT fat yet. hrrmph.)

gabriel – you’re already going…going…GONE to fucking Oz already! So get lost already! Slack, slack. Always kena caught by S1 for no apparent reason. Exchanged his not going outfield with us with a lot of extra DOO duties. Good on you, mate. At least it made you a pool pro. I mean, look on the bright side! HAHAHA i am SUCH a DAWG.

So much for the maggots in the 33rd BTACC…ORD loh.



1. vacation reply - April 22, 2013

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