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quando felix sum? March 22, 2008

Posted by The Truth in Im Allgemeinen.
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When will I be happy?

It’s a question that people don’t ask anymore. It’s a question which is deemed as wasting time, so carry on with your job or your paper chase, do your best, and hope for it as well. Shut up and study hard. Shut up and go to school. Shut up and get into a good university. Shut up and get a good job. Shut up and get married. Shut up and have kids. Then what?

We are unhappy because we are profoundly aware of something we lack – we lack perfection, we lack immortality; we lack wisdom, we lack freedom; we lack money, we lack the few marks which my friend got and we didn’t. But we always hope, à priori, that Things Will Be Better. Will they? We always dream for a better future, a future where we have good marks, more money; a future where we are free and wise; a future where we are immortal (in God or in medicine, that’s really your choice), a future where we are perfect.

But will we ever be? Good marks and money are attainable; Freedom and wisdom is too, but to a smaller extent. Immortality and perfection, we will never attain.  And it is this awareness of what we lack which pushes us on to hope that one day, someday, we will be happy.

But be it out of force of habit, or plain competition, we push this aside; happiness is always beyond our reach. We attain a goal and are happy – then the illusion is shattered.  There is more lying in wait – as my parents said when i was still in school: ‘your results can always be better.’ Perfection is always the standard against which we measure results – but the further we go up the scale, the fuzzier perfection becomes. It’s easy to say that 100% at every test is perfect. So what’s the perfect amount of money? And even more, what is the perfect idea of perfection?

Quando felix sum? Quando felicies sumus?

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